The Power of One Liners

Comedians deliver them artfully and get big laughs. Singles use them to start a conversation and maybe a relationship. Advertisers use them to get you to buy stuff. And politicians rely on them to win your vote.

When it comes to coaching and teaching, one liners can also promote growth and learning; help us to sustain awareness and new habits and, perhaps most importantly, provide a simple way to pass along ideas and share knowledge (maybe even wisdom) with our colleagues. One of Vantage International’s clients fondly coined the phrase ‘Leta-isms’ to describe her favorite one liners from my own conversations and educational programs!!  

“We love to have you work with us.  We call your one liners "Leta-isms" in Library Land.”     Kathy

One liners are effective because they are:

• Easy to remember and repeat
• Memorable in some way – a unique way of thinking about something; humorous or entertaining; or just plain clever
• Worth remembering – they make a point 

  

Be aware that not all of my one liners are my original material. I’ve collected powerful phrases that have helped me to grow and achieve success over a decade on two; and I generously sprinkle them throughout my coaching conversations, public and private because they do the same for others.

Here is a list of the Vantage International team’s favorite ‘Leta-isms’:

• Own the moment!
• Be the best version of yourself each day!
• Big doors swing on small hinges.
• Know yourself to grow yourself.
• Lead from your seat.
• Be memorable in a good way each day.
• Don’t let anyone or anything dull your sparkle.
• Be better and different. 
• Reach for the stars and settle for the moon.
• Good is the enemy of great. (From Jim Collins)
• Practice leadership & followership every day.
• What you permit, you promote.
• Manage things…Coach people.

Now it’s your turn! What’s that one thought, one quote, one word or phrase that made a huge difference for your leadership trajectory? What’s your favorite one liner?

Re-member Your Team

EXPRESS COACHING MOMENT

‘Re-member’ Your Team

For those of us who lead teams, one of our most urgent and important priorities is to attract, cultivate and keep world class talent. Having a team filled with exceptional performers doesn’t just give you bragging rights; it’s one of the few remaining ways to distinguish yourself and your work from the competition. It’s one of your best competitive edges! And it doesn’t just happen on its own either.

That means that we must intentionally set aside time from our often insanely busy schedules to aim ourselves at this work. And when we’re really tight on time, which is almost always, we tend to focus far more on the first two elements of the talent equation – recruiting the best (attract) and growing and building our bench strength (cultivate). It’s hard for me to argue with this approach; we can’t live without them.

But let’s not forget that third element – retention. Keeping top performers once they’ve joined us. What are we doing to ‘re-member’ our longer tenured stars & superstars?  To once again, emphasize how proud and appreciative we are to have on our team? To sing their praises? To give them our undivided attention? To re-ignite their passion and enthusiasm? To refresh their energy?

It’s time to stop taking our strongest & longest performers for granted. One best practice to consider is conducting ‘stay’ interviews. Of course, we make time for interviewing recruits. And we find time for exit interviews, often asking what we could have done differently to keep the person. Stay interviews give us an opportunity to answer that powerful question before it’s too late to make a difference.

Leadership Dare – Pick two tenured top performers and schedule an hour with each. Tell them what you’re up to and ask them to think about ways that you can help them to be happier and more fulfilled. Thank them for their leadership and tell them what their contribution means to you and the team.

Don’t think you have the time? Think of this as an investment….a trade-off. There just might be one less exit interview in your future!!

New Year’s Day Reflection

The first of January is another day dawning, the sun rising as the sun always rises, the earth moving in its rhythms, with or without our calendars, to name a certain day as the day of new beginning, separating the old from the new.

So it is.  Everything is the same, bound into its history as we ourselves are bound. Yet also we stand at a threshold, a new year is something truly new and fresh, still unformed, leaving a stunning power in our hands!

What shall we do with the great gift of time this year?  Let us begin by remembering that whatever justice, whatever peace and wholeness might bloom in our world this year, we are the hearts and minds, the hands and feet, the embodiment of all the best visions of our people.

The new year can be new ground for the seeds of our dreams.

Let us take the step forward together, onto new ground,

planting our dreams well, faithfully, and in joy.

Own The Moment!

I love this simple, powerful phrase because it embodies the essence of everyday leadership. I’m using it more and more as a memorable call to action to show up as the very best version of yourself throughout your work day.

Here’s why it’s become one of my favorite workplace mantras:

1. It reminds us that we are owners of our experience, our work and the success of the entire organization.
2.  It offers a gentle reminder that the small choices that we make throughout our day – moment by moment – are important and that we are more influential than we think.
3. It makes leading a very intentional, purposeful work life seem more doable. It might seem nearly impossible to choose one’s behaviors, thoughts and attitudes for the entire day, which, for too many of us, stretches beyond the traditional eight hours. But to focus in the moment and make courageous decisions – that suddenly seems possible.
4. It supports a culture of personal accountability in which each of us is seen as a capable adult.
5. It’s easy to remember and uncomplicated in its message.

So, how do we translate ‘owning the moment’ into practical action? For me, it means that:

• We thoughtfully relate to others throughout our day. We pay attention to others and we practice the Platinum Rule, treating others as they want to be treated.
• We plan and prepare for meetings, interviews, conversations, and interactions with each other and with our customers, clients or patients so that we can be most useful in those moments. 
•  We are our best selves more often.
• We consider the consequences, intended and unintended, of our words, non-verbal messaging, attitudes, behaviors and general approach.
• We choose to act as adults.
• We sincerely want to help others to have great outcomes, memorable experiences and success. We let others shine and it feels good to us.
• We keep our word, our commitment, to live by our organizational values, our rules of engagement and our very best practices.
• We affirm a realistic optimism in all that we say and do.
• We stand up and do the right thing, even when it’s hard, risky or unpopular.

What does ‘own the moment’ mean to you? What will you do differently tomorrow to own more moments?

Week 1 Leadership Dare: During the next meeting that you attend, own the moment by helping the facilitator to conduct a successful meeting. What would it look like and feel like to be the best version of yourself at that meeting? Remember, little stuff matters!

Week Two Leadership Dare:  This week, I have challenge that may be really tough, even for the best of us. But it wouldn’t be a challenge if it didn’t stretch us, right? So, here goes:

This week, whenever you receive constructive feedback on some aspect of your approach or behavior, I dare you to OWN THE MOMENT! Instead of a knee jerk reaction to shut down, become defensive, dismiss the person(s) and/or their perspective  or even go on the offense and shoot back a sarcastic or cynical response, choose to be your best self. Really think about what the other person had to say. Consider the real possibility that you may have a blind spot when it comes to your behavior. Allow for the fact that this feedback may be spot on. Ask questions to gain more clarity. Think about other options that you could have considered. Don’t overlook the opportunity to thank the person who delivered the feedback. It’s a courageous best practice. Finally ponder what they said and make a commitment to change if it’s the right thing to do.

Sounds simple but it’s not easy to do, particularly if it’s not your habit today. Take the dare and own the moment! 

Window of Accomplishment

For me, September is the best month of the year!  For most, but not all, of us, the summer gives us a mini break in the action. The pace slows at least a little, we take summer vacations or ‘go on holiday’ and return refreshed and renewed, either from a blast of ‘fun in the sun’ Vitamin D or the energy that comes from a bucket list adventure. So, when September rolls around, we’re ready to reposition our leadership lens, take on our challenges with grit, grace and gusto and light some sparks of possibility. Yep, we’re perfectly positioned for a fresh start!

And the added bonus that September offers is that it’s just a few short months away from the end of the year and the magic of the Holiday season. It triggers this ‘sprint to the finish’ burst of creativity, productivity and enthusiasm – a three month window of accomplishment!

How will you capitalize on this remarkable window of accomplishment this year? Let’s be particularly choiceful about how the next three months unfold. What do you want to do between now and the end of the year so that when you look in the rearview mirror you feel satisfaction, pride and, dare I say it, relief? To make it the greatest Fall of all?

Here’s are a few ideas to jump start your own thinking. Stay tuned in throughout the month for more!

Leadership Bright Idea #1: There’s a saying that originated in the Southern part of the US – If you have two frogs to swallow; swallow the biggest one first. I think Brian Tracy, well known motivational speaker, says something similar, “If you have to eat two frogs, eat the ugliest one first.” Your ‘frog’ is that task or assignment that is the biggest, hardest and/or most important; maybe it’s the one on which you’ve been procrastinating and you’ll most likely continue unless you take action right now!!

Consider the fresh start of September and the window of accomplishment as a call to action. Ask yourself, “What’s my biggest frog?” Is it the big stack of paper that’s occupied prime real estate on your desk for months? Is it the next chapter of your book that’s been blocked for a while? How about those performance reviews?

Start by thinking about how it will feel to swallow that frog! Visualize the completion of the task. Now play big; be brave and bold; shift into gear and get started!

Leadership Bright Idea #2: I was with a group of colleagues, facilitating a leadership learning program. At the afternoon break, I was connecting with several participants, chatting together about change, growth and being a better version of yourself.  One of those colleagues said something that was simultaneously wildly funny and strikingly honest; so much so that it’s stuck with me and I’ve noodled on it for the past several days. In response to our conversation on being better and different as a leader, he said, “But sometimes you just get sick of working on sh$#t!”

After I stopped laughing, I realized the unvarnished truth about what he said. I love personal mastery work; learning; growing; changing habits and abandoning dysfunctional comfort. But sometimes, even I need to cut myself a break. To acknowledge that I’m perfect enough just as I am. That I have a lot going for me. That I’ve come a long way and made great progress. Sometimes, you just need to pause and celebrate yourself, just as you are!

So, for a change of pace, use this window of accomplishment to focus less on what you need to do to improve yourself and more what you’ve already done! How about thinking about or writing about one of your brilliances; a 2015 accomplishment that’s already in the bag; complements and positive feedback; new habits that you’ve sustained; relationships that have grown…

Vacation Rituals: The First Day Back

There was a distant point in my career when I had a love/hate relationship with my vacation. On the one hand, I really understood the value that vacations could create in my life. Time away from the workplace is a much needed opportunity to recharge my batteries, shake off dysfunctional comfort, renew my passion and commitment, feed my sense of adventure and exploration and tend to my most prized relationships. On the other hand, I’d darn near kill myself beforehand to get outstanding work complete (or at least moving forward); and I’d stay plugged in while I was away. Worst of all, in the final days of my vacation, I’d start dreading my first day back in the office. Wading through piles of correspondence; steeling myself for the back to back meeting schedule that awaited my return; and playing a mean game of ‘catch up’ on all of the projects and other ‘stuff’ that continued to move (or not) in my absence. Sadly, I sometimes wondered if taking a vacation was really worth it; after all, there was a pretty hefty price to pay for being away….

It’s almost painful for me to think back to those days. But, that was then and this is now. And I didn’t know then what I know now and that is…..

•  Taking a vacation increases productivity, creativity & innovation and engagement. Contrary to the old school way of thinking, it’s not a ‘zero sum game’. The gain that you can receive from vacation does not necessarily translate to a loss for the organization!
•   You can create a healthier pre- and post- ‘vacation ritual’ that doesn’t leave you drained.

Almost a decade ago, I decided to intentionally create a different experience that would allow me to enjoy vacation time, wring as much personal value from it as possible AND build a smoother reentry to the express lane on which we travel together at work!

Here are some of my personal top tips for changing your relationship with ‘vacation time’ forever:

1.      Use your vacation time (duh)!  Did you know that those of us in the US work in the only developed country in the world without a single legally required paid vacation day or holiday? And one in four of us doesn’t have a single paid day off?  So, if you’ve got them, use them.  We’re taking the least amount of vacation time in over 40 years and leaving $52.4 billion on the table by not using all of our time off.  Plan most of your time off and schedule in advance.  Reserve a few days for spontaneity and for the unexpected.  It’s a booster shot for commitment, innovation, productivity and engagement.
2.      Delegate strategically both before and after vacation.  These are bona fide opportunities to build your bench strength and fortify your succession plan.  And you will fall in love with the freedom and peace of mind that this gives you.  I make it a practice to identify one or two people who are standing in for me (in general or project specific) while I’m gone. These folks know the boundaries and have the power to act within them.  If you haven’t been coaching your team members for such stretch assignments, start NOW and work toward your next vacation. Control freaks, beware!! This is going to be a tough assignment.
3.       If you’re spending your vacation away from your home base, allow at least one day between returning home and returning to work.  While it may seem to some that this cuts one’s vacation short, I have found it to be an incredibly helpful buffer, particularly if time zone changes are involved.  Return to as many of your normal habits, e.g. exercise, as possible that day. Savor this day!
4.      Carve out specific time on your first day back to work to debrief with those who stepped into your role and to handle top priorities. This means scheduling specific time on your calendar before you leave for these crucial conversations.  Be specific about your expectations for the debriefing sessions.  Don’t forget to focus on what went well and offer both acknowledgement as well as coaching. Grow your team members!!
5.      Make that first day back, special in some way.  Spread around your appreciation for the work that was done in your absence. Share the freedom that you experienced, knowing that your capable team was moving things forward.  Arrange (before you leave) for a special treat – e.g. coffee, cookies – for everyone that day.
6.       Be intentional!  Check in with yourself on any limiting thoughts or beliefs that you currently hold around vacation (time away from work).  Remember, the most important conversation that you have each day is the one with yourself!  In your head!  Challenge your same old same old thinking – If I hadn’t chosen to do this work, I may still be stuck in the ‘vacations aren’t worth it’ mindset.  Create affirmations and use them throughout the month before you leave.  Remember, to change your experience, you must first change your mind (thoughts).
7.       Boldly unplug from your work related electronics while on vacation. Yes, completely! Trust that your team members will step up to the leadership challenge; that they are smart enough, resourceful enough and committed enough to do a credible job.

  

Are you ready for a leadership challenge?

Week 1 Challenge:  Commit to your vacation!

Today, I dare you to check your available vacation time for the next 12 months and make tentative (yes, I know you have to check in with others!) choices on when you’ll use that time. Hold those dates on your calendar. Confirm those tentative dates within two weeks. Share those dates with your team. Encourage them to use their time off throughout the year as well.

Week 2 Challenge:  Let’s go tech naked!

If you and your technology have never been separated before, then don’t go cold turkey on your vacation. Instead, start smaller and unplug for one day over the weekend. So, this Saturday or Sunday, put your technology out of sight and get comfortable with letting go. Invite others to call you on your home phone if there is a true emergency.

Week 3 Challenge:  Work from the inside out!

This week, examine your own thoughts and feelings about time away from work. Write them down. Do they portray a positive, healthy mindset? Do they represent who you were, who you are or who you want to be?

If it’s time for a makeover, then re-write the script for the next conversation with yourself. Tell yourself a new story – the benefit of vacations for yourself and others. The ease with which you’ll return to work and re-engage. The freedom you’ll enjoy. The joy of giving undivided attention to yourself and family. Create a series of affirmations that lock in this new way of thinking. 

Week 4 Challenge:  Activate A New Vacation Habit

This week, select one tip from my top picks list and use it! Or, if you’ve identified a new habit that is very meaningful to you, then select it instead. Begin to take action now so that you can use it during your next vacation.

Evaluate its effectiveness.

Optimism is a choice!

Optimism comes from the Latin word for ‘the best.’  It simply means favoring the best possible outcome. For me, there are two brands of optimism:

·         Unrealistic optimism (aka naïve realism) – The thinking here is that great things will happen almost automatically.  Positive thinking alone can transform our wishes and hopes into reality.

·         Realistic optimism – Still a vigorously constructive mental model that views people as active agents who help make things happen. Realistic optimists know that in order to be successful, they’ll have to be courageous, answer the call to action, plan well, access resources, persist, bounce back, carry on and follow through!

I choose to be a realistic optimist!  For me, it’s not naïve, romantic or idealistic; rather, it’s an asset through which I (and my clients) can become my best self and make a difference through my relationships and my work.  Research associates it with greater measures of health & well-being; longer life expectancy; and more general happiness & prosperity.  At work, it’s an essential catalyst for change & improvement as well as creativity & innovation.

Right about now, some of you may be thinking - ”That’s great but…isn’t optimism part of a person’s hardwiring or isn’t it something that you get from your earliest experiences that gets embedded in your psyche?”  

My answer is yes, optimism is hardwired and yes, it may come more readily if we were exposed to it regularly as kids.  Each of us has a unique endowment and experiences in our formative years.  But that’s only part of the story.  Research tells us that education & personal effort can trump your starting point.  Even our genes need regular input to work properly as we grow & develop!  To a large extent, then, realistic optimism is a CHOICE!

Let me give you a simple little example from my own childhood.  One of my mother’s favorite phrases was ‘bad things happen in threes!”  She really seemed to believe this with certainty and went to great lengths to point out many threesomes. I grew up with this mantra in my head.  If something bad happened to me, I would try to game the system be forcing two (small, benign) ‘bad’ things to happen quickly so that I could get clear of that particular cycle.  Finally, there came a point in time, when I realized (through education) that it really wasn’t true and I laughed it off and went on.

I agree with Rick Warren who says, “We are products of our past, but we don’t have to be prisoners of it.”  Realizing that your past doesn’t necessarily predict your future frees a person and opens you up to sparks of possibility around you.

Cultivating the habit (yes, I said habit!) of realistic optimism is more critical today to overall success than ever before. Why? Because we are navigating powerful currents of change; because our work is more complex, our environment more unpredictable and our pace is blistering. We need every edge to be our best selves.

My coaching question to each of you is….Through what lens will you choose to view your workplace, your community, even our world?

For the remainder of this month, take my leadership dare:

Commit to an optimism upgrade!!

Upgrade 1: This week, think about Rick Warren’s quote, noted above. Are the leftovers from your past that are holding you back or keeping you stuck? Identify them clearly and specifically. Then, for each, identify one thing that you are willing to do to free yourself from its influence.

Upgrade 2: Take a vacation (preferably a long one) from ‘the news’. I think it would be pretty discouraging to see the world exclusively through the lens of the media news.  For me it’s a distorted view. The news reports on things (mostly bad and sensational) that happen, not things that don’t happen. When was the last time that a TV crew reported happily on how many countries weren’t at war or cities that haven’t had a mass shooting? In many cases, when you look at the whole picture, the facts tell a surprisingly optimistic story.

Upgrade 3: Reclaim the word ‘do-gooder’! The heck with those who think this word is anything but a wonderful compliment.  This week, make it a point to make a positive difference in the lives of your colleagues, clients and significant others in your workplace. Consider it your super power for the week!

Upgrade 4: Avoid catastrophizing!  Stop thinking about or expecting the worst – from people, situations or experiences. We’re talking about realistic optimism here, so skip the rose colored glasses. We need to seriously attend to problems and challenges without minimizing or discounting them. But portraying everything as a ‘catastrophe’ is overboard and counter-productive. It contributes to a culture of fear and robs us of our most valuable resource when it comes to problem solving….our creative mind.